Robert’s 3 Point Stance | An Angry Cowboys Fan Vents

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Robert’s 3 Point Stance
Tendencies, Trends, Habits, and Addictions: An Angry Cowboys Fan Vents
Robert Schwartz – Featured Writer Silver and Blue Report & Hook’em Report

Dallas Cowboys | Angry FanTendencies, Trends, Habits, and Addictions: An Angry Cowboys Fan Vents.
Everyone has tendencies. 600 times out of 1000 I wear a blue or a green shirt to work. Every group of people has trends. A lot of the younger crowd puts huge ear stretchers in their head like some sort of primitive mating thing. Some people have habits. My mother eats Godiva Dark Chocolate every night. The worst of us have addictions like smoking cigarettes, heroin, and losing big games when they count the most (December).

It was cute when the Current Dallas Cowboys had a tendency to blow big games in December like a nickel hooker on dime beer night. After a few years it became a trend. Teams could plan around the Cowboys in December and get easy victories. Just pressure Romo a little and the November Miracle becomes the December Doofus with one flip of a calendar page.

Two years ago, it became a habit. Something you work hard to overcome, but nothing that haunts your waking days and nights. Today, it became an addiction. And just like an addiction to cigarettes it stinks, it sticks with you, and it’s something you can’t stop without SERIOUS medication that can cause blindness, certain sexual dysfunctions, and sometimes losing your coach.

I’m angry, disappointed, and hungry for some traction. Since the Tuna error (oops, era) we’ve been knocking on the door of mediocrity. We’ve never gotten over the December Hump. There’s nothing these guys are doing to make me think they have the guts, the balls, or the gutballs to stand up and shout “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!” No one is taking charge and saying “We have an addiction, an addiction to losing when it counts, and it’s time to TAKE SOME SERIOUS MEDICINE” (certain sexual side effects notwithstanding).

If it’s not Romo, Red Ball, Rexxy, or anyone else on the field, it HAS to be Jerry Jones. Maybe you fire everyone. Cut Tony Romo, cut DeMarcus Ware, cut off everything. We have an addiction. We’re junkies for losing. I love to watch the Cowboys, but the closer they come to knocking on the door, the more we suffer. I’m NOT buying that Ware jersey for my 3-rd Grader for Christmas to replace his outgrown Romo jersey. I’m going to try another sport like Ice Curling or Soccer. Nobody knows anything about Soccer, so just pick a few teams and root for them. I don’t think they even keep score in Soccer. But I do know they don’t play the confounded game in DECEMBER.

Please Santa, all I want for Christmas is an intervention.

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{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

Regina Stultz December 5, 2011 at 12:54 am

Robert-

Although I agree with a lot of the things you’ve stated above, I have to admit, I am addicted. Addicted to my ‘Boys. Addicted to hoping and praying and talking them up to anyone who naysays them. And when they lose in December, when the marks in the W column are so coveted, so needed, so hungered for, the L that gets put there instead is like a strong drug that slowly leaves the body. Leaves the body thirsty, withdrawing, begging for just one more fix….just one more…….win. I can say with pride and maybe a little shame……….Hello, my name is Regina, and I’m an addict. I AM a Dallas Cowboys addict. I’m not ready, and I DON’T WANT an intervention. I want to sit in front of my TV and SCREAM at the top of my lungs, “LET’S GO, BIG D!” And, yes, I know the outcome of this addiction. There are only two, really. Either the W goes in the column and I float on a cloud of happiness for a week, or the L goes in and I sit for a week, moaning and convincing myself, it’ll be here soon……Romo will have a stellar game……. D. Ware will sack so many times the other teams QB will want to cry……..Witten will break the record for most TD’s scored by a TE………it’ll be here soon. No matter how many times, my body and soul goes without that fix….I’ll wait. Yes, I’ll wait for it. And when it finally happens….when the sweet taste of victory fills my body, and my soul, and I sigh in contentment……I will tell myself “I’m a COWBOYS fan and will be until I die!”

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